An Unnecessary Moment with Unsolicited Medical Practice Advice from an Unqualified-Yet-Concerned Citizen // #1

There’s a medical practice here in Louisville that specializes in a certain “medical issue” that is only applicable to men.  They advertise quite frequently, boasting that they ONLY handle said issue. I won’t mention the issue specifically; those who live here will likely know the practice of which I speak, and others can use your imagination. (Actually, don’t – I do not want to be responsible for any imaginations run amok.)

First of all, I believe I understand why this medical practice has chosen to specialize thus, namely, it gives potential and current patients alike the confidence that these fine medical professionals are giving {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE, aka EMI} the focus it deserves.

However, {EMI} is something I would imagine most folks would not want to be public knowledge. Which would, therefore, make any VISITS to {EMI CLINIC} precarious, at best.

In the current situation, if you’re seen walking into {EMI CLINIC}, you’re either:

(a) lost,
(b) picking someone up after a (presumably painful) procedure,
(c) dropping off religious literature, or
(d) seeking medical care/advice for {EMI}.

Here’s the question I would pose to {EMI CLINIC}: Why not specialize in TWO areas of health men may be concerned with?  Say, {EMI} and Athlete’s Foot.?  Then, when we in the community run into a guy in the parking lot of {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE & Athlete’s Foot CLINIC, aka EMI&af CLINIC}, most of the awkwardness is automatically eradicated, for EVERYONE!

”Hey, Bill*! What are you doing here?”

”Oh, you know, just having my, uh, ‘Athlete’s Foot’ checked on.”

”Well, that makes total sense, Bill, because that’s one of the TWO things they do here at {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE & Athlete’s Foot CLINIC} . . . (long pause) . . .Ok, see ya around!”

”Yeah, see ya!” (skips into {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE & Athlete’s Foot CLINIC} while whistling the theme to The Love Boat.)

*The name “Bill” is the first name that came to mind and is not an indication that I believe it is likely that a man named ”Bill” would need the services of {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE & Athlete’s Foot CLINIC}.  I know several Bills, and they are, to the man, great guys who I’m sure have never had issues with {EMBARRASSING MEDICAL ISSUE} OR athlete’s foot.**

**Not that there would be anything wrong with them if they did.***

***This just got really awkward again. So sorry.



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