Author’s Aside //1 – “Traveling”

This is the part of the (blogging) program where I start to wonder if using this format to practice and purvey “fiction” was a wise choice because fiction is so darn difficult.  Who knew?! So, while I work up (read: “draft and then cry in despair over while eating a large Peanut Butter Cookie Dough Blizard and wondering why I even try”) the latest edition in the L&T of The Scientist, I offer this observational aside.  Normally, something like this would end being “fictionalized,” but I realize that to keep posting regularly, I need to compromise (cheat?), so I have devised a clever device I’m calling an “Aside.” No one has ever done such a thing, I know.  But, not only do I have superhuman abilities, such as willing my bald spot to stop growing and injuring myself during naps, I have wonderful ideas that no one has ever imagined before! (Oh, and please look up Poe’s Law if you’re wondering if I’m serious or not, because I refuse to use a smiley here!  And thanks for reading.)

Sometimes it’s fun to go to Whole Foods simply for the experience of feeling like you’ve traveled to a different country, if not a different planet. It’s (marginally) cheaper than actually traveling, but it feels just as foreign. You recognize virtually none of the brands, and the prices couldn’t possibly be in American currency.

“Boy, I sure could go for a Snickers, but I guess I’ll have one of these Schnoogens. Sure hope the exchange rate is low because 10 Yuan is kind of steep for a regular-sized Schnoogen. I mean, I MIGHT pay that for a Butterdoodle or even a pack of Happy-Happy Globs, but not for a measly Schnoogen, no sir.”

And then you spot something from back home, like a (3oz) can of Coke or a loaf of sliced white bread, and you get a little misty-eyed, vow to call your mother more often, and start to plan a visit to friends you haven’t seen since you were seven.

It’s the little things, really.  Thanks for the reminder, Whole Foods.

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