The Human Alarm Clock

Modern alarm clocks and apps usually have a setting which allows them to become progressively louder or more obnoxious as the minutes tick away. I realized this morning that I have become this for my family, as my tone and language escalates:

6:15 am – “Good morning sweet girl, my flower. It’s time to get up.”

6:30 am – “I know you’re tired. But it’s Friday, pumpkin. The weekend is almost here!”

6:45 am – “Hey sweetie, we have to get ready. Come have some breakfast, my love.”

7:00 am – “Ok, babe, we need to get up. I’m turning the light on.”

7:15 am – “We’re going to be late if you don’t get up right now.”

7:30 am – “There’s just time to throw on your clothes and jump in the car. You’ll be lucky to grab a granola bar on your way out. C’mon! And, no more TV at night.”

7:45 am – “If we don’t leave now, we WILL. BE. LATE! If you’re late much more, they will kick you out of school, and you will end up in a roadside lean-to selling “holy” rainwater and shell necklaces to tourists! And not that there’s anything wrong with that, but I don’t think that’s what you want for yourself OR for your parents who have sacrificed so much for you! Throw on a jacket or afghan, grab a dang Pop Tart or a bag of Cheetos, and GET IN THE CAR!!”

8:01 am {Dazed and mumbling, as kids file out of the van} – “Have a . . .a great day. Daddy. . . daddy loves his sweeties. Daddy LOVES his sweeties. . . Daddy . . .”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s