Next up, as part of our series “Our Tech Overlords and the Subservient Souls Who Love Them” (Not a real series, but maybe it should be!), a further reflection on passwords:
Passwords are officially out of hand. I don’t recall this level of nonsense when I was building forts with my buddies back in grade school:
“Hey Mikey, it’s Phil. Let me in.”
Password, please.
“Seriously? Uh, ‘TheAwesomeBoys'”
I’m sorry, that doesn’t match our records. Password, please.
“What?. . . uh . . . ‘DaAwesomeBoys!'”
I’m sorry, that doesn’t match our records. Password, please.
“Doesn’t match. . .? What are you even talking about? What records?!”
Password, please.
“Dude, just wait until I get in there, you are so DEAD . . . ‘The@wesomeBoys!’. . . ?”
It looks like you’re using an old password. You changed your password 6 months ago.
“6 mont. . .what is happening?! Mikey, c’mon man this isn’t funny! It’s me! Let me IN!”
Would you like to log in with Google?
“What’s a Doogle?”
Would you like to reset your password?
“Ok, Sure, yes, fine!”
Ok. We just need to confirm your identity. What is your mother’s maiden name?
“What. did. you. say. about. my. momma?!!!”
Thanks for reading! May all of your password recall/reset attempts today be frutiful!
phillipmullins.com 